on a mission...

lately, i have felt this deep calling, and even if you don't care, or you don't know what i am talking about, or you think this is stupid, i know this is a calling of God, it is my dream, and someday, it WILL come true. and i just have to say it somewhere, somehow, how incredibly BUILT FOR ME this mission is.

last fall (september to be exact), i went to my first Christian rock concert. it was amazing!!!!! :))))) anyway, it was to see my favorite band, which you probably know by now if you read any of my other blogs. :) anyway, so i went and i enjoyed myself so much. but, the thing is, while i was there, there was this really cool speaker. his name was sammy adiyibei (not sure of the spelling). so he spoke just before sanctus real came out, and i've been thinking a lot about that lately. about what it would be like, traveling with a Christian band, listening to them sing and talk about Jesus every night, and watching these kids be impacted by Christian ministry, and then, having the honor of being a part of that, to impact kids lives and to have the incredible honor to speak to a generation every night, and pour out Jesus' love for them... it's just something i feel like God has called me to do, and i can't wait to be a part of that. i just don't know how to get there. maybe soon. God, show me how!!!

the thing is... the first year i went to college, i went in as a theology student, because, for one, i LOVE youth, and i love ministry. even though i don't have much experience speaking publicly, i love the experiences i've had, and i LOVE connecting with people one-on-one. secondly, i LOVE Christian music. LOVE IT! like, you don't even know. my family thinks i'm crazy, cuz i can't stop playing it. and for like, the past half a year, i've been dying to meet sanctus real (even though that probably has nothing to do with it).

i don't know how to explain it... it's like... you know who you are sometimes, and you know God has this incredible plan for you, and then He shows it to you, if only just a little bit, and you're like, WELL, DUH!!!! WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT? and that's kinda how i feel... except for one addition... "when can i start?"

*sigh* i hate it that it takes me so long to be prepared by God to do the things He has called me to do. well... until later... keep chasing Jesus. :)